Musings on Hawai'i

Whenever anyone asks me, "How was Hawaii?", I feel dissatisfied with my response. How can I convey what it was like to live on the Big Island for a month as a family? From their follow-up questions I can tell that they are envisioning that I spent a month lying on some beautiful beaches. Maybe I'm different from most, but lying on beaches for a month sounds very unpleasant. I've seen people that have lain on beaches for years and from the looks of it they will be enriching some lucky dermatologist's life in the near future. The beach isn't all bad; I like sitting next to Gina, talking and reconnecting, and playing with the boys in the waves and the sand. Our trip wasn't really about lying on the beach; my goal was to spend a lot of time together as a family, building some valuable memories, and I think we were wildly successful.

Why go to Hawai'i? The easiest way for me to answer that is to list the things that we were able to do:

• Swim in lava heated ponds
• Catalog the abundant life in the ocean: sea turtles, manta rays, moray eels, tropical fish
• Go to farmer's markets
• Watch native dancers
• Witness the power of volcanoes, tsunamis, the ocean
• Climb Mauna Kea
• Hike into Waipio Valley and down to Kealakekua Bay
• Scale banyan trees
• Explore lava tubes
• See the Southern Cross
• Paddle in an outrigger canoe
• Go to the temple
• Eat new foods
• Experience another culture, another solution to the problem of living a meaningful life

These are things we would not be able to do at home. New experiences excite me. They allow me to learn and grow, to examine my life from new perspectives. I feel that one of the gifts I can give the boys is new experiences in a supportive environment where they are free to explore and figure out what they like.

Besides sharing all of these experiences with the family, I was able to watch the boys grow and develop. They grew increasingly comfortable in the water, learned that they were strong and competent hikers, and adjusted beautifully to all the newness. I like that they identify as people that try new things. As they gained confidence in their ability to negotiate new situations, I gained confidence in their ability to live successful lives.